4:00am

I haven’t posted for awhile. I find it very hard to keep up with things like this.
Its a worry I have with regards to CBT.

I have seen the mental health guy.
Depending on your opinion that went well/bad.

I don’t feel he asked many relivent questions. He said at the end he didn’t feel there was much wrong.
This is not the answer I was hoping for.

Something is wrong. These fucking mood swings have always happened. Have always help ruin my life.

I have been content for the last few weeks but now, I’ve been awake since just before 4:00 and I can not sleep, can not stop thinking about things. Can’t stop thinking about what that stupid mental health guy said, and how it went, and his college with her fucking horrible limp handshake. And how she interrupted me but I didn’t snap at her. Why didn’t I snap, I hate when people interrupt.
I can’t stop thinking about other times my mood has been low. Jobs I’ve quit. Dropping out of college. Getting kicked out of school. Storming out from a night out. Arguing with the girlfriend and how those moods led to us breaking up.

So I’m sitting on my bed at 4:00am writing this and crying.

Fucking great